(Above) That is him. Bravest man. And you will see why. My Husband Bruce Cole
The bravest man I know is my husband Bruce Donald Cole. From little bits and pieces that I have included in my blogs, Bru has had a brain tumor since 1999. He had a craniotomy then, radiation and then a couple of years later he had chemo for a whole year.
In 2015 he had another craniotomy and it was successful. He came home and he was getting back on his feet, walking with his cane, when he started to lose the strength in his legs. He began to fall a couple of times a day. This was only days after the surgery so we were really worried.
When Bru falls, I can’t pick him up by myself. He tries to crawl to something that might help him climb up, but that rarely worked back then because he just didn’t have the strength and his right arm was pretty much paralyzed from the seizures.
The next time Bru fell, which was the same day, I called 911 and they came and got him back up. But this was bad. Really bad. He shouldn’t be falling like this. The surgery had been a success.
The next day Bru fell again. By now I was comatose and really just mumbling words and blowing spit bubbles out of my mouth when the ambulance came. Bru looked great. The paramedics were pretty concerned this time and they took him to the hospital. I just stayed home and played with my coloring book.
The hospital in Strathmore sent him off to Calgary where they did an MRI and that went to his neurologist team at the Foothills hospital, who communicated with the ambulance that they wanted him brought down there right away.
Bru had a bad infection in his brain, at the site of the craniotomy and they had to operate right away. They phoned me and I got down to the Foothills as soon as I could.
He came out of the operation really well, but he was now unable to walk. So he stayed in the Special Services unit for 3 months while he learned to walk again and after his 90 days, he was able to shuffle his right leg along the floor for a bit, but bottom line, he was now going to be in a wheelchair.
He came home in January 2016 in a wheelchair to a not-wheelchair house and we spent tons of our money renovating to get things set up better. We didn’t qualify for any kind of refund or program because we earned too much money as a dual income household, even though Bru was retired. We spent months and months perfecting the right clothes and underwear, socks and special shoes and finally got it bearable for him to live by day and sleep by night. We got two power chairs for him to rest in the afternoon and sleep in at night.
All through this Bru worked hard on his physio while I stayed home and watched cat videos. I was having a hard time coming to terms with all of the changes that were happening so suddenly but the bottom line is that he was so brave through everything, right back from 1999 to when all of this was happening.
But that is not the bravest moment he has ever displayed. THIS is what I call brave.
Bru was already wheelchair bound for a couple of years now, so it was maybe late fall of 2017. I had a doctor’s appointment in downtown Calgary and I drove in for the late morning meeting with her.
Bru and I have this app called Zenly. He can track me as I’m driving, see my speed and exactly where I am in real time. I can check him out too, but since he is usually right where I left him, I don’t check much. I am on the highway quite a bit in all kinds of weather so it makes him feel better if he can check and know that I’m still moving along.
Early on in our use of Zenly, there was one time I was going to surprise him with something from Dairy Queen but when I walked in the door he shouted DAIRY QUEEN, YAY. I’m standing there with the bag behind my back, one fist in front of me going ZENLY. Sort of like NEWMAN, but sadder. He had tracked me in the drive-through.
So anyway, back to his incredible bravery where he should earn a medal. I’m at my doctor’s appointment and it ends, I leave and I’m driving up 16th Avenue to leave Calgary when I spot Peter’s Drive-In. There is only one in town and they make great burgers and fries and I haven’t been there in ages.
I’m thinking – today is about me – I’m going to get a burger and fries and rather than get a bunch of stuff for Bru and I, then race home (30 minutes drive), heat everything up, serve it, blah, blah, blah, I am going to get food for me and just pull off somewhere and eat it – HOT.
So I did. I drove east on 16th and saw a great parking lot at the Holiday Inn, around the side, which had a great view and there was no one around. I pulled in, parked, hit the tunes and started eating.
Without a word of a lie, this is what happened next. I started to think – what if Bru Zenly’s me and sees me at the Holiday Inn. That would be funny. Me at a hotel. What would he think? And just as I was starting to go off on that line of thinking, my cell rang on the Bluetooth. I answer and IT’S HIM.
“HE-OW”, my mouth is full of burger and fries. I eat like I came from poverty.
He says “WHAT ARE YOU DOING AT THE HOLIDAY INN?”
Me: “ARE YOU KIDDING ME? YOU SAW THAT I WAS AT THE HOLIDAY INN AND YOU HAD THE BALLS TO CALL ME ON MY CELL? YOU ARE THE BRAVEST MAN I KNOW. I AM SO PROUD OF YOU.”
Bru: “YEAH, THANKS. WHAT ARE YOU DOING AT THE HOLIDAY INN?
Me: “I GOT A PETER’S BURGER AND I’M SITTING IN THE PARKING LOT EATING IT – HOT.
Bru: “DID YOU GET FRIES?”
Me: “YES, I DID GET FRIES – THEY ARE SO GOOD AND THEY ARE HOT TOO! WHY DID YOU CALL ME ON MY CELL? I COULD HAVE BEEN BOUNCING ON SOMEBODY’S DICK RIGHT NOW. DID YOU WANT ME TO ANSWER THE PHONE?”
Bru: “I WAS WONDERING WHAT YOU WERE DOING THERE. I JUST HAPPENED TO ZENLY YOU AND THERE YOU WERE.”
Me: “WELL, THAT WAS VERY BRAVE AND YOU HAVE MY RESPECT AND ADMIRATION.
Bru: “DID YOU GET ME ANYTHING?”
Me: “NO, IT DOESN’T LOOK LIKE I DID. LET ME SEE HERE IN THE BAG. NO, THERE IS NOTHING HERE FOR YOU. SORRY.”
Bru: Click.
So that is how Bru became the Bravest Man I Know. I mean, really, what guy would call his wife if she showed up at a Hotel on GPS?
Conversely, Bru could be very certain that no one would want me bouncing on their dick. He’s been around me for 31 years. He does pretty much know everything about me. AND, he’s seen me naked. Like, really naked.
Hmmm.